Year 2008. Level 12. I am uncertain about my growth this year, but they say change is inevitable. Whether I fully believe it or not, I have grown, or I’m just being a bit of an optimist. Entry 2:All of my comrades and acquaintances have changed, so I must have too, but it is about time I throw some of them away and make some new ones. Some new enemies too.Entry 3:I haven’t accomplished much this year because the achievements I’m still stretching for are still distant. My priorities are so abnormal, but I’ll continue to be determined, patient too. Entry 4:I have accomplished school for the most part. I told myself that English was the only class I needed to pass, nothing more. Since I liked being lazy I liked the idea and I still wouldn’t have it any other way.Entry 5:Senioritis killed my grades. It’s too bad I’m not motivated enough to see high marks on my report cards. I don’t even remember if we put the grades on the refrigerator door or not when I was younger, but whatever. Math, Science, and more science were too easy and I decided to fail them by excessive absences. Entry 6:There was always English class and band class.Entry 7:I respected the musicians in Malden. Their competitive will inspired me to be a part of them. I obtained the same motives as them and we all had teamwork. I really felt like I was in a team and I’m happy I worked my hardest for us, because they know I did. Entry 8: I was also glad to have so many, of all kinds, students in my English class. It’s comforting to know that others are having a hard time in areas you are having too. If my fellow students had quit, would I have quit?Entry 9:Earlier, no, that was a stupid question. I don’t think I’m weak-minded. I told my self to at least get a 60 in English, and that’s that.Entry 10: I just realized that my class was like a team, but I failed to see it then. We all had the same motive after all. But yes, leaning on them was comforting. Entry 11:I’m on the verge of failing English. Most of my work wasn’t done on time, I wasn’t diligent enough, and my priorities were elsewhere. I can’t blame the time I needed for English for anything, and I need to get it done, out of the way. That’s what I said 4th quarter. Entry 12: I tried my best 4th quarter. I hope it was enough to fix the slack of 3rd quarter. And to think, if I got just a few more points in 1st, 2nd, and 3rd quarter, 4th quarter would be a lot easier.Entry 13:Jeez, why is it always like this. If I’d try harder in the beginning, I wouldn’t need to rush my self at the last few seconds. And I wouldn’t be on the verge by a few points. It’s not like I enjoy the feeling of being on the verge. The verge of complete failure, and ultimate relief. Though it is defiantly a thrill, it gets adrenaline running… dangerous, a little fun, much like a match on halo.Entry 14:I found something interesting. I just read a quote by Benjamin Disraeli in my agenda book. “The secret for success in life is to be ready for opportunity when it comes.” The secret of success is preparation. So my start needs to be as strong as the end. No more being on the verge. It can be fun and dangerous, but I can only be there by real difficulty, that is what a true challenge is, and this is what I learned in English this year. English was only half a challenge to prep me for true challenges to come. I need to be prepared.Entry 15:I can’t really remember individual moments in class. I remember the people in it, but not what the people did. Their personalities seem to glue to their faces though, but it is kinda sad. Maybe I can reminisce with a friend or two to brainstorm some things, when we are old, sitting in front of the lawn in plastic chairs. Doing that isn’t really that bad.End of log.
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